Leo propels team to victory with a jazzy performance

Among the many youngsters that flocked to the Pond pitch this morning, returning after a long absence was a player that has a special place in the Club’s history.
Forever known as the hero of Cobham for his thrilling performance on MG7, Leo didn’t waste any time to show us what we missed. It took him exactly 12 seconds to score after kick-off, sailing towards the goal with the speed of a bebop tune and the intensity of a Charlie Parker’s solo. The opposite Blue team was caught by surprise as Italy against Albania in the inaugural match at Euro2024, but the match quickly went in another direction.
Leo’s Orange team double up few minutes later with Eduardo and got a third one with Adam, an easy tap-in after an intoxicating first-touch team play that saw Andrea, Endi and Nizar moving the ball with razor-like precision.
Adam’s tap-in was a very gentle touch, he didn’t need any power being only 50 centimetres from the goal line, still it was enough to bring down the goal of the Blue team. At which point the play had to be stopped to allow the Club’s engineering team on the pitch for the necessary repair. It turned out that one of the post had mysteriously bent like a Uri Geller’s spoon. Was it actually a trick of the Israeli psychic, hidden among the public? The question remained unanswered.
During this long, unexpected break, while the goal was being carefully repaired, the Blues called an urgent strategy meeting to address the situation. Their team had amazing attacking talent, boosted by surprisingly skilled rookie Bilal, but was lacking in defensive grit and midfield power. While various creative options were considered (including the use of passing-by dogs to annoy the Oranges) the solution presented itself in the form of three late comers: senator Chetan and Massimo, a safe bet for any defence in any professional sport on any planet, and talisman Giacomo, a box-to-box player that always deliver.
All three of them were furtively given a Blue shirt and enrolled in the team without notifying the Oranges, hoping they wouldn’t notice. In fact, it didn’t take long for the Oranges to realised they were now spectacularly outnumbered, still they felt so confident that they didn’t complain and kept playing in attacking mode.
The three-men advantage quickly reduced to two when David had to leave to avoid getting a parking ticket (ah, if British politicians were as efficient as London’s traffic warden….), but it was still enough to block further attacks from the Oranges and give the Blues plenty of opportunities to launch fast counter-attacks where four of five of them would face only two defenders. Still, despite their numeric superiority, the Blues seemed unable to put the ball in the net.
As time passed, the score remained at 3-0 and it was clear there was not going to be a remuntada, but the Blues found redemption at the very end. Thanks to Francesco, who scored the golden goal with a precise low-driven shot in the lower corner.
After the match, while Chetan run away to help India win the Cricket World Cup, Francesco was seen on the phone with what appeared to be a very worried Luciano Spalletti. Aware of the pathetic attacking potential of the Azzurris, the Italian coach begged Francesco to fly to Berlin in time for their clash with Switzerland, but (as you can guess from what happened later) the executive jet sent by the Italian delegation didn’t arrive in time.
After the match, Leo collected the Man of the Match award for what BBC pundits defined “a jazzy performance”. Leo seemed pleased with that definition: “Years and years of training as a saxophone player have taught me that timing, intuition, and feel are paramount” said Leo, “like jazz, top football needs both technique and fearless improvisation.”. Exactly what Italy missed in their last Euro2024 match…
ORANGES – BLUE 3-1
GOALS
Oranges: Leo, Adam, Eduardo
Blues: Francesco