Master Game 11: Unstoppable Kids beat Dads 10-4 in a spirited game with beautiful goals

THE OFFSIDE REVOLUTION
The MG11 started with a revolution: a belated one in fairness. Some 162 years after it was officially introduced, the Master Gamers decided to adopt offside. The gravitas and reputation of the Referee had a big impact on the decision, but in retrospect it looked like an audacious move, not least because of the lack of resources, namely VAR and linesmen. Every single player felt entitled to contribute to the novelty, unsurprisingly in a partisan way, so that soon the souk in Marrakesh looked like a quiet place compared to the MG11 on the day.
Everyone, on and off the pitch, was calling offside: at one point one Dad, whose name we omit for decency, was spotted yelling ‘offside’ from inside the bathroom in the changing rooms.
Andrea kept shouting to his mates to keep a high defensive line to trick offending Kids into the offside trap. He looked exactly like Baresi commanding the back four of Sacchi’s AC Milan in the 90s, but with slightly different results…History shows that Revolutions often defocus people from their ongoing duties and early ideals while at times turning the very perpetrators into victims.
DADS LOOKED GOOD ON PAPER…
Dads had experience to spare, with many midfielders but some of them, namely Bijan, could easily have played in defence as much as in any part of the pitch, excelling with every move. Salvo was called in to protect the defence alongside Julien and initiate counters with long, splitting balls feeding the strikers, allowing Yassin to play in a more advanced position.
Despite the key absences of lethal forwards like Daoud and Nizar, the ones on duty, Francesco, Victor, Jonathan and MG Rookie Matteo, showed a good understanding, keeping Paride busy. Massimo and Hossam were trusted to impose their law in the Dads’ box with the only question mark regarding the Egyptian’s ability to last long as still fighting a recurring injury. Unfortunately his contribution was short lived. Luckily, Chetan, fresh from his cricket raids, was in superb form and his versatility allowed him to play anywhere in defence.
Dads were led into this critical game by Yassin, sporting the captain armband as a sign of gratitude and respect for being the GOAT of our game and ahead of his departure back to Morocco. You knew that, regardless, you could trust Dads to fight for every ball as if their lives depended on it.

… BUT KIDS LOOKED BETTER ON GRASS
Surprisingly, Kids had only 10 players to start with, while Dads had 13. This begs the question: ‘what did absentees, on both sides, have better to do?’. It is the postman who always rings twice, not history…
As soon as Johannes saw Giancarlo on the Dads’ bench, he made a bold move with an offer that made the current Saudi bid look like spare change: it was the first time the Italian wore a white shirt in the Master Game. There was an important implication to the move: the average age of the Kids’ team shifted from 22.4 to 26 years reducing the gap v Dads accordingly, to a still notable 22 years. Frantically quant betting agencies adjusted the odds but they were not too sure which way.
Kids had everything required of winners: speed, strength, audacity. Tactical awareness was provided by Johannes, who started from the back every single move, dictating the tempo and timing the runs, in turn, of Alex, Aurian, Marco and Giuseppe who repeatedly broke the 20 miles speed limit and created havoc in Dads’ land. Even when they remained in 10, with Alessandro out for injury and no substitute available, Kids did not have to alter the style of play nor their tactics.

FIRST HALF: FAST PACE, BEAUTIFUL GOALS
Kids’ freshness showed from the start: Giuseppe, Aurian, Marco and Alex seemed to have springs in their shoes and managed to break Dads’ resistance on their left flank. Running from behind, Giuseppe and Aurian were especially able to take Dads’ defence by surprise. Within few minutes, Kids were 2-0 up and the game seemed to take a one way avenue. But appearances, especially when Dads are involved, can be deceptive.
Matteo, a proper MG Rookie, managed to open his own account at MG (and the Dads’ one on the day) putting the ball behind Paride after a prolonged action. But just when Dads’ hopes were restored Marco scored a beauty: spotting Alessandro off the line to stop a Kids’ incursion, he lobbed a ball over him from close to midfield. Commentators compared the shot to those of Beckham, Rooney and Xabi Alonso but in the eyes of the Kids’ fans that was, and always will be, a ‘Marco’s.
Giuseppe, till then unstoppable brought the score to 4-1 for the Kids but stubbornly Dads refused to surrender. With a penalty converted by Yassin they managed to go into half time at 2-4, a gap that they have many times overcome in Kensington Gardens. Kids spent the break with a mix of exuberance about their performance and apprehension on the likely reaction of the Dads, who still looked full of energy and always able to find new solutions on the spot.
SECOND HALF: MORE OF THE SAME (AND KIDS ON STEROIDS)
It was, though, Kids that started on the front foot with Giuseppe setting the score at 5-2.
Far from demoralised, Dads attacked as one man and soon after manufactured what was undoubtedly the goal of the Match, if not of the season. Yassin was holding the ball in midfield waiting for someone to make a move: as soon as Victor hinted one, he found the ball on his chest in the middle of the Kids’ box. Before anyone could understand what was going on, let alone react to Yassin pinpointed assist, the ball was in the back of the net: 5-3 game on.
Carlo Ancelotti in the stands was rubbing his hands: Victor’s reliability and consistency, on top of his brilliance, is exactly what Brazil has been lacking since 2002. You can bet Brazil fixtures at the 2026 World Cup won’t be colliding with the MG12…
Dads’ attacking tide did not relent and luckily Kids could count on Paride to do few vital saves. At one point Kids had to resort to illegal practises in their box and yet again they were correctly punished with another penalty. Yassin advanced with confidence towards the penalty spot eager to sign off at least with a brace his last Master Game (or hopefully not): his shot hit the bar with such violence that, two days after, it is still shaking.
It was a defining moment as Dads would have had just one goal to score to catch runaway Kids and, with momentum on their side, that was a distinct possibility. Kids stepped on the gas and made sure there was no comeback for Dads: Aurian, Giuseppe, Alex and Ghislain scored in rapid succession with only Francesco to counter on the opposite front bringing the score at
9-4.
Giancarlo had a golden opportunity to score in a MG after nine years when a penalty was awarded to the Kids. His reticence to take it was fully justified by his chequered track record, but both his teammates and especially his opponents insisted. He took it and, surprise surprise, yet again Alessandro saved it.
Interestingly, the theory that with full size goals is much easier to score was severely tested as two out of three penalties were missed on the day.
There was still a happy ending for the Italian when, dancing on the offside line, he intercepted a timely pass from Johannes, grounded the keeper with a dummy and chipped the ball over the line just as the final whistle went sealing a 10-4 Kids’ victory. That was on record the oldest goal ever scored in a MG.
Giancarlo’s muted celebration was testament to his inner contrition and turmoil: hero or traitor? The few soft jeers on the stands gave way to growing wild cheers on either sides, suggested that fans had the answer.
MAN AND REF OF THE MATCH
Despite the loss, there were true heroes among Dads.
On a standalone basis, Bijan had all the requisites to claim the accolade: strong and timely in defence, creative and imposing in midfield and dangerous in attack even when taking corners. Dads’ recruitment campaign should focus on Bijian clones: young, strong, committed, gifted.
Yassin left his mark not only on the bar but also on the game. Dads’ tactic to reinforce midfield with Salvo, along the ever-reliable Julien, paid dividend as Yassin was freer to create and offend: it was not by chance that strikers scored three goals and were provided other opportunities. He will be missed badly, but his epic gestures stay in the Dads’ history book, and his example always there to be followed (for those who can…). Privately he said that if Morocco goes to the World Cup final next, year FDs and FKs are all invited!

But almost inevitably, awards are associated with victory, particularly when they are so …. (ten goals is a record for a MG). The hero of the day had to be found among the Kids.
One of the shortlisted three, Johannes, did not score any goal but was behind many of them, orchestrating the play and making a meal from the offside trap with penetrating and timely passes for the runners.
Aurian had another good day at the office after his PSG trashed Inter Milan (not to be confused with AC Milan) scoring a hat-trick. Always on the move, he created and concluded at will, ending the game as if he hadn’t started yet.
Giuseppe too had an extraordinary season with Napoli clinching an unlikely scudetto and you wonder why he is not in the squad. Perhaps they have spared him for Champions League next year. He also scored a hat trick and made himself available to his teammates in every part of the pitch, alternating altruism and killing instinct to the benefit of the squad. A gifted and generous player (he always leaves tips to the ball boys…) deserving to lift this very much coveted trophy. Not for the first time and certainly not for the last.
Remarkably, Tony L grabbed with both hands the ‘Best Referee’ award. He directed a not-easy game with both grace and authority. The three penalties awarded were all spot-on, and on the most difficult offside calls VAR simply could not clarify them and refrained from any decision while Tony was always there putting his reputation on the (offside) line.
There was only one moment of slight embarrassment when Tony, addressing a player who kept protesting, warned him that he would extract his card, but instead of the yellow or red one it was his Amex with account and sort code well highlighted. The mistake was instantly rectified and, as a token of respect for the competent handling of the game, each player, from both factions, shook end and complimented him.
MG12: IN NEED FOR A NEW FORMAT?
It was another fantastic day of Football and Friendship. Our fans, as always, get a good deal on whichever benchmark you use, regardless the winners and the score. Yet we all could do with MGs going to the wire, with last minute goals as it often happens on a Saturday morning.
Actually it happened to the earlier MGs too, finishing with only one goal difference as you can see from the table below (in need of update). At the time, in fact, we used to swap players, especially at half time, to keep the game balanced and vibrating. Perhaps we should think about reintroducing such rule, for example persuading Kids to pick two over-sixty Dads in exchange for two under-thirty Kids at the start of the MG and then assessing the situation at half time.
In case you haven’t noticed, now, in stark contrast with the past, Kids are overwhelming Dads in number on a Saturday which naturally strengthen them further. While this is for me movingly satisfying, it exposes Dads to the risk of heavy defeats in future MGs. Also, while is sacrosanct that Dads become more experienced every year, we must accept that the other side of the coin is a higher risk of injuries than Kids. All in, perhaps we should present the Board with a set of new initiatives aimed at making MGs impossible to predict for bookmakers.
Finally, as Hossam pointed out, we should aim at making the MG more of a family event with WAGS and siblings as we did often in the past. We have one year to find a convenient venue for that (and a strong argument to persuade friends and family to be there!).
MASTER GAME 11
KIDS-DADS 10-4
GOALS
KIDS: Aurian (3), Giuseppe (3), Marco, Alex, Giancarlo, Ghislain
DADS: Matteo, Yassin, Victor, Francesco
TEAMS
KIDS: Paride, Luca, Alessandro, Ghislain, Joshua, Johannes, Alex, Aurian, Marco, Giuseppe, Giancarlo
DADS: Alessandro, Massimo, Hossam, Chetan, Bijan, Julien, Andrea, Salvo, Yassin, Victor, Francesco, Matteo, Jonathan

