The Uneasy Art of Converting
AI and algorithmic intelligence were questioned the moment the speaker announced the two teams: Colours were loaded with five defenders, while Orange had a full firing squad of five strikers. No wonder the traffic in the Colours box was more intense than in Trafalgar square, made even more hectic by the huge number of corners taken by the Orange.
Perhaps the artificial minds knew better, as the resulting match was far from being a one way street. Surely Orange could have done with a couple more role defenders, but both Giancarlo and Yuness justified their (huge) salaries with disciplined performances under Massimo’s commanding direction.
On the opposite side, a superb collective defensive display combined with the profligacy of the Colours’ attack made for a frustrating day for the Orange fans, who nevertheless supported their beloved team from start to end.
Our fans will never stop doing that. Included in their tickets, by default, are moments of sheer brilliance that are hardly replicable: like when today little Arman stopped a long ball with the outside of his foot, the way he saw Neymar Jr, and with one touch evaded Hossam attention, the sort of thing other players are not allowed to even try, let alone pull off.
Swapping the conversion rate between the two teams would have amounted to a comfortable victory by the Orange, who after the match were lobbying to introduce a new rule: ‘every four missed sitters you get a goal’.
After 15 minutes, with Oranges two goals down by virtue of copycat Ishan brace identically assisted by Johannes, the Orange politburo called an extraordinary meeting. The decision was to relieve Yuness from his unnatural and penalising left-back position and restore him as a playmaker in the middle of the pitch, a position he plays with both grace and efficacy.
The move paid instant dividend when the Moroccan lifted the ball over the Orange defenders to provide Marco with a golden opportunity, coolly converted. Marco was back from Michigan after a long absence: the goal made justice of the fat price to redeem him and pay a first-class air fare to bring him back.
Francesco added an opportunistic goal, which was not ruled offside simply because we don’t do offside, putting Orange back in the game.
Ishan, the only striker for the Orange, fully lived up to his reputation as a silent killer by scoring a brace. Additionally, Colours put in place a system by which every midfielder took turns making sudden runs into the Orange box to be invariably and timely assisted behind enemy line by a teammate taking full advantage of the light disposition of the Orange defence. That meant the likes of Johannes, Anton and Salvatore all scored, constantly keeping Alessandro and his back line on red alert.
On top of this, the Colours’ left flank, patrolled with authority by Andrea M, kept relentlessly supplying extra ammunitions for his forwards to test Alessandro’s abilities.
The writer must now pause to sing praises for an unsung hero: Andrea M. While perhaps not as explosive as the early Gareth Bale, Andrea is tactically a very reliable asset, always present on his wing, providing a reference point for any attacking manoeuvre and guaranteeing cover on opposition counters. It is rare to find in today’s market a player who so effectively fulfils both the defensive and offensive phase, naturally playing the full back and winger role in one. A bargain for the CLUB: pay one, get two.
In search for a draw, Orange pushed higher up the pitch and reaped rewards from goals by Jonathan D and Giammario, closing the gap at 6-4.
Momentum began to swing back in favour of the Orange, but at this late point the fight was as much against the clock as it was against the Colours. When the former struck 11.45, the two-goal gap had not been closed and Orange were left needing a golden goal to restore morale and pride.
But Johannes had none of it. After a run with the ball glued to his foot, he scored the golden goal with a shot deflected into the net. Very much a case of fortune helping the braves.
This final solo effort, along with two goals and two assists, earned the young German the Man of the Match award. Slightly below in the ranking were Ishan, now a regular, and Anton among the Colours, and Yuness and Gianmario for the opposition.
The latter is an Italian Rookie who showed that speed and control are default items of his football kit as well as new kids’ assets.
COLOURS-ORANGE 7-4
GOALS
COLOURS: Ishan (3), Johannes (2), Anton, Salvatore
ORANGE: Francesco, Marco, Jonathan D, Gianmario
TEAMS
COLOURS: Hannes, Hossam, Riccardo, Matej, Thomas, Andrea M, Johannes, Salvatore, Anton, Ishan.
ORANGE: Alessandro, Massimo, Giancarlo, Marco, Yuness, Gianmario, Jonathan D, Arman, Jonathan L, Francesco.
